5 years later

Middle of June 2022 and I have been here for 5 years now.

I think I have assimilated myself with the culture here.

I can speak comfortably to the locals here. I can joke and I am not pressured with the language anymore. 

It is hard to imagine that it has been 5 years now. 

It was really difficult in the beginning. 

Being alone in a new country. I have to take care of myself even if that means starting anew in anything and letting go. It is like leaving a comfort zone. It is like getting out of bed. I think many people dreads getting out of bed!

Forcing myself to learn the language so that I can find a job to be financially independent. And when I found a job, I have to learn the working culture. Speaking with an accent and with broken Swedish in the beginning made me a loner at work. It was sad in the beginning but today, I am okay. I enjoy eating lunch by myself now as I can listen to podcasts. Podcast is a thing here. I think that is how single company keep themselves occupied. 

Everyone says that it is difficult to make Swedish friends. Well, I belong to that statistic who says it is so. I do not have any Swedish friends. I do have Swedish colleagues. I was active in Meetup activities where I joined hiking activities prior to the Corona pandemic. I met lots of foreigners and very few Swedish people. During the pandemic, I did not meet many people. Now, after the restrictions are lifted, I meet some people. What is  a definition of a friend, by the way? If someone tells me that it is someone that you can share your problems or communicate frequently, unfortunately, I won't have any friends at all then. Let us keep the definition simple and the bar very low. My interpretation of a 'friend' today is someone who I meet, have something to eat or drink with, make 'not-personal' conversations and to have a social life. To be honest, I am okay with that too today! I was not initially but I have to align myself with the current society I am living in. 

After 5 years, I have also found out that I enjoy baking, cooking and being in the garden. I plan and prepare meals two weeks ahead. I baked Malaysian kuih too. I am proud of myself in that area. In Malaysia, I do not cook often or bake at all. I plant vegetables too. I did so many new things that I never thought I could. 

One thing I stopped doing was running. Because race fees are so expensive here and I do not get much in return, so I am not inspired to run. In Malaysia, race fees are very cheap and we get so many freebies. I run if my workplace sponsors the run. So, I have done two runs within 5 years, and each was 5km. 

However, I replaced running with cycling now. I enjoy cycling so much that I am so lazy to walk. I bought a bicycle during the pandemic and I cycle a lot since then in every season. I was amazed at myself for my perseverance in cycling during winter. I did not think I would survive it but I did. 

I have unlearnt, learnt and relearnt many things. 

I think I can comfortably sum up that I will continue to live here until life takes a turn again.